Sunday, January 1, 2012

A Gratifying End to "Tebow-Mania"

Miracle Boy Tim Tebow upended by Kansas City Chiefs' defenders this afternoon. Look for Tim and his Broncos to get stomped next week by the Steelers.

Despite the shellackings administered to the Tim Tebow-led Denver Broncos the past two weeks, by the New England Patriots and Buffalo Bills respectively, Tebow-prayer groupies, Jesus freaks, assorted holy rollers and their hangers-on were out in force today at Sports Authority Stadium at Mile High in Denver expecting another miracle. They firmly believed Tebow the Bible boy would lead them into the promised land of the playoffs for the first time in over a decade.

Denver sports writers, mainly Tebow groupies, were just as delirious with the likes of Woody Paige predicting a mini-blowout, and others (like Dave Krieger) predicting more modest victories. It appears none of these elite writers looked behind the numbers and possibilities to see a Tebow ambush by the Chiefs waiting in the wings. I did and it was based on pure logic. Two weeks ago the same Chiefs had defeated the previously unbeaten Green Bay Packers (now 15-1), by 19-14 by applying a fierce "man under" press coverage on defense (to keep Aaron Rodgers contained) while engineering a do enough offense with no turnovers.

I saw no reason why, if they could do such a number on the NFL's best team, they couldn't do the same on Tebow and the Broncos. As it turned out they did, 7-3, which sounds more like a baseball than a football score.

Though billed in Denver as the "Orton Bowl" - because for the first time it featured a previously -released quarterback (Kyle Orton, dumped by the Broncos) against his successor, it was actually much more subdued and merely became a showcase for the Broncos gaining the final divisional crown (AFC West) by virtue of nemesis Oakland losing at home to San Diego, 38-26. Had Oakland taken care of business, they'd have had the AFC West instead of the Broncos. In any case, Tebow and the Broncs gave new meaning to the oft-used term "backing into the playoffs". Because they sure haven't entered as any kind of conquerors....errrr. ...crusaders.

Given this, the Broncos and their holy roller QB won't last long against the Pittsburgh Steelers, 12-4, who will be their playoff opponent in Denver next week. I can promise you that Tebow will spend most of this time running - away from the mighty Steelers' Defense, including linebakcers James Harrison, and Troy Polamalu.

As for this game, the final line for Orton was 18 of 29 for 180 yards and a below-average 71.0 passer rating. But below average was considerably better than Tebow's final line: 6 of 22, 60 yards, 1 interception, 1 lost fumble and a 20.6 rating - lowest in the NFL in all games played today. Where was Tebow's deity when he most needed him? Maybe he had other things in the universe to attend to, who knows? But as usual, Tebow did a Tebow at the end and thanked 'his Lord and Savior',.....for what......I don't know. Maybe keeping him humble, or teaching him a lesson....not to let his ego overwhelm his earthly perspectives.

Tebow was just 3 of 8 in pass completions for 29 yards at the half. After three quarters, Tebow was 4 of 14 for 43 yards. The Broncos' offense failed to score a point by halftime. For the sixth time in 11 games, they failed to score more than 3 points by halftime.

Crippling the Broncos' offense in this seasonal rematch with the Chiefs was they lost two starters to injury early in the first half. Right guard Chris Kuper, the senior member of the offensive line, suffered a severe dislocation where his leg meets the ankle in the first quarter. He will not play in the playoffs.

Now, why did Tebow's "lord" allow that to occur, given he had to know - given his omniscience - the extent to which any success by Tim depended on them. The Broncos also lost fullback Spencer Larsen to a knee injury. Again, Tim, what's with your lord? Why let that happen to a stand up guy?

Tebow also lost a fumble at the Chiefs' 13 yard line that prevented kicker from attempting a short field goal, and then with barely two minutes to go and driving for a possibly winning score, Tebow was intercepted by the Chiefs.

How oh how could this have happened? Why did the miracles end?

These are questions for which Tim Tebow's followers want answers.

The simplest ones are there for the taking, or accepting: Tebow is NOT a God boy, he isn't "holy" and doesn't work miracles....and oh, football is just a game played by over-sized, bipedal primates on one remote planet in an ordinary spiral galaxy - one of hundreds of billions.

Maybe Tebow maniacs will finally get that next week after they're decimated by the unholy Pittsburgh Steelers while the latter's towel -waving fans (who follow their team everywhere) howl with derision and glee.

In the meantime we may be sure "Tebow mania" has finally, finally run its a bad case of the flu!

1 comment:

tom sheepandgoats said...

Alas, the flu returned. Who would have thought it?

One has to wonder if God is truly honored to be portrayed as someone who (apparently) ignores terrorism, injustice, depravity, mayhem worldwide, but never misses a game, eagerly tweaking for both winners and losers.